ESSAYS — SCOTT MUSKA

IT'S PRETTY CRAZY HOW BUSY I AM

THE GREAT HALLOWEEN CONDOM RUN

YOU, THE FILM, METAPHORICALLY SPEAKING

DEAR WOMAN WHO WAS SITTING NEXT TO ME ON THE PLANE WHEN I DEVELOPED AN ERECTION

ATTEMPTS TO SET UP A DATE WITH MY AIR CONDITIONING REPAIRMAN'S DAUGHTER

MISSED CONNECTION: HOSPITAL WAITING ROOM

BILL RAFTERY NARRATES ONE OF MY SEXUAL ENCOUNTERS

'HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER' FOR A NEW GENERATION

SYNOPSES FROM AN IMAGINARY SITCOM BASED LOOSELY ON MY LIFE

THE COMMODE MALFUNCTION: A BREAK-UP STORY

WHAT I WANT: THINGS AND STUFF

SCOTT'S FIRST STD SCARE

A RELATIONSHIP COUCH THERAPY SESSION WITH BRANDI, THE MUSKA FAMILY DOG

All of my pieces are here.